I don't consider myself much of a complainer. In fact, I think most people who know me think I am pretty upbeat. I'm good at finding the silver lining in most situations. For the rare occasions where the silver linings are just too tough to spot, I'm pretty good at mocking my bad fortune sarcastically and ruthlessly. If I can't make it a positive, I'm sure as hell going to make it funny.
The unthinkable has finally happened though...I've hit my limit. The last 6 months have been filled with hospitals and bad news and airports and disappointing siblings and caretaking and cancelled plans and an evaporating personal life and AAAAAAAH!!!!
I give up. Karma wins. I don't know what I did to piss it off, just tell me what I need to do so it will lay off me a bit. rescue a puppy? feed the homeless? find world peace? Just tell me, it has to be easier than my life right now.
Someone find me a pity-pot...I need to have a seat. I'm too young to be dealing with all of this crap. I should be out having a life and having fun, not worrying constantly and researching medical treatments. I want to be carefree and happy for a little while. I want to be able to make plans that I don't secretly believe will fall through. I want it to be a good thing when the phone rings...not some precurser to more bad news. I don't want to be the strong responsible person anymore. Maybe I'll run away from home...can you run away from home when you own the house? No? Fine then, I'll just stop cleaning it.
....OK, I got that out of my system and feel a little better. I guess it's time to find a way to make my step-mom's breast cancer diagnosis funny because I'm sure not spotting the silver lining here.
1 comment:
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