Things I learned at San Diego Comic-Con 2011

Here we go!

1. I am predictable. Year after year, my favorite cosplay will be based on some silly video game that has eaten up entirely too much of my time...still, love it!




2. You know that fantasy every adult has had about rolling around in a big pile of money? Kids have it too, only with a slight variation.




3. If you head on down to South Park you will, in fact, have yourself a time.




4. Princess Leia will cut a bitch. Moments after this photo was taken, the middle Princess Leia in the gold bikini (PLITGB) "accidentally" smacked the blond PLITGB upside the face with a plastic Jabba the Hut. Seriously. You can't make this shit up. (side note, I am completely unable to mask my loud laughter at such an occurrence no matter how inappropriate or how close I am standing the involved PLITGB's)




5. Nerds are industrious. I don't care how sunny it is. When the urge strikes and they need to watch an episode of Battlestar Galactica, they find a way.




6. I want to believe their parents were being ironic when deciding to dress their cute little girls up as red shirts and not that they just liked the red. So wrong!




7. Fezzes are cool. So are bow ties. If you don't know why, you don't deserve to know why.




8. Everyone has a karaoke song that resonates for them deep down. For this guy, it was the "Finger Bang" song from South Park. I really don't want to think any further about that.




9. Nicholas Brenden is not aging well.




10. Initiating a new generation of Comic-Con attendees is awesome.




Don't mind me, I'll just be over here in the corner sleeping for a week until I am ready to start hunting tickets for 2012. The rest of the photos for the day can be found here.

The shoemaker's kid has no shoes...

Guess what I did last night? Christmas is in a few days so some reasonable guesses might be: Clean the house, bake cookies, wrap presents, make pudding out of some figgys. Any of those are things I should have been doing last night.

Instead, I was rebuilding one of my computers. We will put aside any questions you might have about the statement "one of my computers" because, seriously, have you met me? Of course I have more than one computer at home. No, we will focus on the sad, sick computer in my house. Why was it sick, you ask? Because I had a virus. Shocking, I know. With all of my computer repairing wizardry, I too can be felled by the work of some l33t speaking punk in China.

This would be the point where you are probably wondering how said virus found it's way around my anti-virus program. (insert Ozzy Osbourne style mumbling here...)

...I'm sorry, you couldn't hear me? I was saying that I wasn't actually using an anti-virus program on that computer. Yes, I am hanging my head in shame. Yes, I have lectured you in the past on the importance of using an AV program all the time. Oops.

I suppose this is where you are thinking that at least it was easy to rebuild because I certainly had a recent backup handy. No one talks about backing up regularly more than I do, right? Ummmm, yeah. I've been meaning to, really. I've just been so busy lately and I ran out of spare hard drives around the house and I've been wanting to do some work on that computer before I backed it up and ummmm...oh, hush!

I am my own worst client and a cautionary tale. At least I totally learned my lesson this time. (no I didn't)

P.S. What is figgy pudding, anyways?

Help Me Help You

I like computers. I like to play with them, teach people about them, install things on them, build them and yes...I even kind of like to fix them. Techie folks like to make "woe is me" jokes about how we are the personal computer repair person for all our friends and family but I think we all kind of enjoy it.

There is something very satisfying about figuring out and solving moderately challenging problems. Rooting out that stubborn bit of spyware or finding and replacing a failing memory chip. Bonus comes when every now and then we get to acquire some fun story to trot out at nerd parties like the computer power problem I fixed by plugging in the power cord or the "broken" printer issue I resolved by explaining to it's owner that if they wanted to print color they would need to actually purchase a color printer...the black & white one wouldn't do. True stories, both of them.

There are the occasional moments that make me want to tear my hair out, though, so I offer some guidance for folks thinking about hitting up a loved one about that weird window popping up lately.


I won't care about your problem more than you do.
If you can't remember anything about what happens when your computer crashes, it is difficult for me to help you. What you were eating or watching on TV when it happened doesn't count.

I give everyone a pass the first or second time they forget to take notice of what an error message says. They can be stressful, I understand. If by the third or fourth time you still haven't bothered to write it down, don't be surprised if I lose interest pretty quickly.


Please don't make stuff up.
I know you don't mean to lie to me, it just happens. Word to the wise, if I ask you a question and you answer me confidently and definitively...I will believe you. Because you are my friend and I like you. If you are answering my question with an educated guess because it seems like it should be the right answer, for the love of all that is holy TELL ME. I promise I won't judge you for not knowing.

Not giving me a heads up when you are guessing turns me into a bitter woman who has forgotten how to trust...at least when it comes to matters of wireless network configuration or any time a sentence ends with the phrase "I am 100% sure".


Be prepared to learn something.
Everyone gets the occasional virus. Don't worry about it, I'll help you get rid of it and make sure your security software is up to date. Calling me for the third time in a month because of the same virus and still not having any idea what to do about it makes my head explode. I don't expect you to know everything but at that point, you should be able to run a virus scan.

Think of it this way...if you call your brother-in-law to come over and help you with your pool because you are trying to save some money on a pool guy, expect him to come over and teach you how to use the tools and mix the chemicals. If you really don't want to touch or learn anything at all about the pool, hire a pool guy. And no, I don't know a good pool guy I can refer you to.


Make me dinner.
If I know you and love you, I won't take your money. Don't even try to give it to me. Cooking me dinner, buying me a drink or volunteering to help me paint my living room is more than enough. (As for that last one, I'm totally taking you up on that soon...you know who you are.) If you live far away, offering to take me out to dinner even if it might never happen is also perfectly acceptable.

All I really need is not to have to hear about how some jerk from The Geek Squad took advantage of you or made you feel stupid. Because that makes me sad. And angry at some of the jerks working for the Geek Squad. Seriously, where do they find some of those guys?

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Likewise, I will promise to keep all of these things in mind next time I ask you about that strange sound my car has been making. Deal?

Things I learned at San Diego Comic-Con 2010

Another great year, another Con post. Here is what I learned this year:

1. Val Kilmer's career is heading in the wrong direction. It's never good to be the saddest looking flyer on the table.




2. I have mad love for anyone who grabs 4 of their buddies and spends the day wandering the floor like this:




3. Cat Woman will flirt with anyone. Sorry Seth.




4. I am surprisingly more tolerant of someone coming dressed as Sarah Palin then as Snookie. I might have been a tad too snarky to "Snookie". Sorry "Snookie".




5. We've come a long way baby. Princess Leia's spotted in gold bikinis = 1. Gladiator guys spotted in male equivalent gold bikinis = 3. The times they are a changin.




6. Little orange price stickers do not make this family friendly.




7. Forget the bad boys...I'll take a snarky comic any day. Watching Scott Adsit from "30 Rock" trade fanboy love with the entire cast of "Community" was a total highlight!




8. Designing your toy to have interchangeable heads may sound cool on paper, but when it gets into the packaging it's just creepy.




9. Someone finally got smart and created the best both swag ever. Those of us stuck in line with the unwashed masses, thank you.




10. Stan Lee is the "Brad Pitt" of the Comic-Con world...complete with entourage, massive security and huge crowds trying to get his attention. I love that when he came through the lobby, everyone gasped and knew exactly who he was.




11. Pink tulle Vader robe, check. Sparkly mask with tiara, check. Mini light-saber, check. It is a miracle that I didn't stick her in my massive SyFy bag and take her home with me.




Another year survived, already looking forward to 2011....Cheers!

What year is it?

I have said it a million times, but I am quite used to being one of only a few women around when I go to some industry events for work. AV is one of the last tech fields that is still mostly men. For the most part, though, the guys aren't cavemen and I am able to succeed and be taken seriously. I will, however, still occasionally wander into an event that catches me off guard. That happened today.

Because I am an altruistic type, I would like to offer 3 suggestions for anyone looking to put on an AV industry event...especially if you expect even 1 or 2 women to show up.

1. If you would like to demo your extremely expensive projector, highlighting how bright it is and how accurately it presents color, I assure you there are better video clips to use than the Victoria Secret fashion show. It will make the group of men staring at a model's ass uncomfortable when I walk up to ask a question. It will also make you very uncomfortable when you realize that you are talking to me about image resolution while pointing at a woman in a rhinestone bra and a wrap that looks like an over-sized pair of open lips. Also, a heads up...I can tell the exact moment you realized the rhinestone bra clip might not have been the best choice, no matter how much you think you played it off.

2. If you would like to demo your extremely expensive video switching and scaling system to show how smoothly it displays high motion video, again I assure you that there are better clips to use than a loop of 3 attractive women in tight shirts flinging their hair around in slow motion. Perhaps an action movie or sports clip? Or maybe a loop of a cute guy in a speedo jumping around...that wouldn't make you uncomfortable to stare at for a few hours, would it?

3. If you would like to impress me with how easy your project management software is to use, the phrase "even the women I have shown it to can figure it out" is not going to close the sale for you. I would like to say I could catch the moment he realized how laughably insulting the thing he had just said was. Sadly, he couldn't have looked prouder of how he had managed to connect with me. A woman. Who had already chatted with him about being a programmer. Who could write similar software. In my sleep.

Hopefully that helps you out as you plan your next event. Best of luck and see you next time!

Beware of the Robots, Part 1: How electronic voting systems work.

I am prepared to admit that this may be my tinfoil hat issue.

It is possible that I am overly paranoid about computerized voting systems. The thing is, I know technology too well. It is my job, my hobby and at times a bit of an obsession. I program, build and fix computerized systems all day long. In fact, my main role at work is designing and programming customized touchscreen control systems. If those words sound familiar that is because it's the same technology being used in electronic voting systems around the country. I have designed complex touchscreen voting systems for local city council chambers. To make a short story long...I am aware of the technology.

I have followed the issue of electronic voting very closely for some time now. As the election draws near, I am becoming more and more disturbed by the idea of how the electronic voting systems in use today may impact the presidential election. I have been known to say that computers should never be used for voting, but that is not entirely true. There are ways to develop and administer fair elections with computerized voting systems...the problem is that we are not using those solutions.

Nationwide, states and counties have been awarding voting system contracts to low bidders who are overly secretive at best and antagonistic at worst in regard to the accuracy of the systems. Security and technology experts are routinely excluded from the input and decision making process. I am concerned.

To understand the problem, first you have to understand the methods being used. Electronic voting systems fall into three main groups:

1. Paper based electronic voting systems.

Paper based systems require voters to mark a ballot in some physical way that will allow a device to later scan it and record the vote. You might punch a hole, mark it with a special pen or even use a touchscreen. The end result is the same, you will leave the voting booth with a ballot that physically reflects your vote. There is typically some way for you to look at the ballot and verify that your vote was marked as you intended.

When the polls close, the physical ballots are transported to locations where they can be scanned and counted by machine. When a stack of ballots is fed into the machine, they will either have their vote recorded, they will be flagged as having no marked vote (undervote) or they will be flagged as having more than one marked vote (overvote).

Paper based systems allow for a physical inspection of the ballots and a manual recount as there are actual physical ballots that can be read.

2. Direct Recording Electronic voting systems (DRE's)

DRE systems are stand-alone computers that provide an interface for a voter to cast a vote. Each DRE machine would be preloaded with the custom ballot software for the precinct. You might record your vote by pressing an actual button or using a touchscreen. Once you have cast your vote, it would be stored in the internal memory of the device (think hard drive) or on some sort of removable memory card (think the memory card in your camera). DRE systems may or may not provide you with a receipt indicating your vote.

When the polls close, each device will report the vote totals it has recorded in one of a few ways. It may print a receipt of the totals. It may transmit the totals over a network to a central location. It may require the device or the removable memory card be transported to a location where the results can be read by election officials.

As the votes are stored digitally, there is no ability to manually inspect votes.

3. Network DRE voting systems

Network DRE systems are very similar to standalone DRE's. They may look the same and to the voter they will work in the same way, however there are important differences. Unlike standalone systems, Network DRE's depend on an internet connection to function properly and to record a vote. The ballot information is not loaded onto each machine, but rather it is supplied over the network. Instead of storing results on the device, results are transmitted to the centralized location in batches throughout the day. There are even areas experimenting with allowing people to vote over the internet on their personal computers.

When the polls close, there is no need to deal with vote tabulation from individual machines as the results have been transmitted throughout the day.

As the votes are stored digitally, there is no ability to manually inspect votes.

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Everyone remembers the 2000 presidential election so it is no shock that things can go wrong. What is shocking to me is that electronic vote counting problems seem to be worse now than they were in 2000.

Up Next... Part 2: How electronic voting systems fail (also known as: what the hell happened in Palm Beach County during the August 2008 Primary vote count)

Things I learned at the 2008 San Diego Comic Con

1. Running into Joss Whedon on the convention floor will reduce me to a stammering dork.




2. The cast and crew of Dr. Horrible are as much fun to watch in real life as they were in the show. I bet they would be a blast to go drinking with.




3. I feel sorry for Eric Estrada... but in a sadistic, mocking, entertaining way.



To be fair, there was a line of people waiting for him just outside of the frame. The image of Eric Estrada standing behind an autograph table in front of many empty rows makes me giggle, though...so there you go.

I don't know what to believe in anymore

I was cooking dinner the other night - rice with a honey vinager sauce, some steamed vegetables...a normal dinner around my house. As I was making the sauce I noticed a fly circling the kitchen and occasionaly making a dive for the vinegar. It struck me as strange given that there was honey out as well, but that fly just kept going for the vinegar.

I though for a moment and then did what anyone would have done in the situation. I put out one bowl of honey, another bowl of vinegar and left town for the weekend. What's that you say? You don't know anyone who would do that? Now you're just messing with my head.

So I returned home tonight and to my surprise I found three little flies floating atop of my bowl of balsamic vinigar and an untouched bowl of honey.

There you have it...You catch more flies with vinegar than you do with honey.

Now I suppose you are going to tell me that you don't know anyone who would have taken a picture and blogged about it either. Yeah right.

Comic Con

I don't think I've ever seen as many people at the same place at the same time. This is insane.


For the rest of the pictures of the day, visit the Flickr Set.

The Beginning of the End

I'm off to read until my eyes cross.

WooHoo

Tell me you don't have the theme song for the Simpsons running through your head right about now. I know you do...at least you do now!

The movie is a week away and the marketing push is in full swing. One of the elusive Kwik-E-Mart 7-11's is right by my office and I am such a geek that I have no shame admitting how cool I think that is. I finally stopped by today to take a few pictures.





There was quite a line outside, in fact there has been every time I've driven by. That's why it's taken me until now to stop.

I always get a kick out of Simpson's humor which is why these were my favorite touches from the inside:





There was also a little art on the side wall for folks who were paying attention.



There were all out of Krustee-O's so I may have to stop by a few more times to try and luck into some before it transforms back into a 7-11.

You can check out the rest of the pictures in my Flickr album.

A Day in the Life of a Girl Geek

I love being a girl geek...except when it sucks.

I'm in the midst of a training for some cool new skill that will theoretically earn me more money someday. Yay! Truth be told, the money doesn't motivate me at all. I love taking classes. I would be in school all the time if I could.

Learning new things, forcing my brain to work through some convoluted programming trick, figuring out which wire to connect to which device to make the lights come on...my heaven in a nutshell. When in doubt and the DVD player isn't working, take it apart and fire up the soldering iron. Doesn't everyone do that?

Now I understand that most girls don't enjoy spending an evening building a computer. Fine. I am very used to being the only woman in the room at these things. Hell, considering that my job has me mostly surrounded by engineers and A/V technicians, I am ALWAYS used to being the only woman in the room. It usually doesn't bother me.

We may have come a long way baby, but lots of guys still get pretty uncomfortable when I walk in to solve their technical problems. Lord help them if I have to crawl up into the ceiling to pull some cable to do it...they just don't know what to do with themselves. Should they help me? Should they stare at my breasts? It's all so confusing.

So I walk into the classroom today, a room full of guys who are not only going to training...they are getting out of the office to be with other tech guys. It's fun and competitive. It means short days in training, late nights at the bar bonding with the other techs, and many beers with the trainer picking up the tab. It's totally guy time...and then I walk in. Now it takes them a minute to realize I am not the secretary. In fact it takes them way too long to figure it out considering I'm carrying a laptop and a tool box, but oh well.

The trainer always makes a big deal out of having a girl in the class. "Hey, the last time we had a girl here was, well...the last time you were here." Yes I know, I was there. The guys seem mildly amused that I have my own stocked tool box, just like a real tech. I begin the internal countdown, waiting for the inevitable joke where they pretend to be surprised that my screwdriver set isn't pink. There it is...4 minutes. Cute guys, never heard that one before.

Going through the motions of becoming one of the guys comes second nature to me. Swear a little at the right times, remember to laugh at the dirty jokes, be better at all of the skills than they are but pretend you don't know that you are better and all is good after a few hours. It just bugs me that I feel the need to prove myself at all. I think it's one of those men/women differences. The guys are definitely competitive, but they just want to be better than the others for the hell of it. There is no sense of needing to prove they are qualified to even be in the room. I know I am better than most of them, but I really want them to know it too. Why is that?

Class ends for the day and we head to the bar. Most have figured out that I am hard to offend, so they have relaxed a bit and are having a good time. Hell, I'm one of the guys now...or am I? Strangely, I am the center of attention (and if you know me, you know that's not my style). They seem oddly amazed that my work days are just like theirs. A few of the guys want to see the pictures of the install job I told them about because it sounds really cool. They keep talking about how they wish the women around their offices were more like me, less uptight, more like one of the guys. The day of competing to be better than each other has become a competition for my attention. I'm a novelty and they are fascinated. It's kind of weird but also really fun.

Did I mention that I love being a girl geek.

Why you need to understand the DMCA.

I'm about to delve into tech talk...forgive me.

For those of you that don't work in or are obsessed with technology, you may not have even heard of the DMCA. The "Digital Millennium Copyright Act" (DMCA) was passed by the congress in 1998 in an effort to establish laws for dealing with copyright infringement related to new technologies. Existing theft and copyright laws were doing a dismal job of handling issues like music downloads or software piracy. A noble cause at it's core...artists and programmers deserve protection from theft just like other industries do.

It's a tricky problem, though. How do you crack down on a kid that downloads a song or computer program he should have paid for? Ethically, it's only a little different than shoplifting the CD from Walmart. Unlike shoplifting there are no security guards or cameras to notice the crime. Let's take a walk through the logic that has led to the DMCA of today:

1. Can't go after the kid? then go after the websites that provide access to steal the music and software...hence the shutdown of Napster. Problem is someone clever figured out a way to share the stolen files without a centralized website.

2. Can't go after a website? then go after the people that write software that makes it easier for people to steal stuff online. Problem is, the software has legal uses too so it is difficult to shut them down. At best, record companies sue them until they are out of business.

3. Can't go after the software creators? then encourage companies to develop their own software that will make their music and software impossible to steal. Problem is, the copy protection software causes all sorts of problems for people who legally purchase the stuff. At best, they interfere with the ability to listen to the music you have purchased. At worst, they install viruses and security risks onto your computer without warning. The ultimate irony, folks that are stealing the file easily find ways around the copy protection.

4. Copy protection is failing? then go after anyone who provides information about how to make it fail. Here we finally come to the one area of the law that has provided some successes to the industry. Successes in court at least. Destroying individuals that create or share information about software security vulnerabilities has become a full time endeavor for many companies. The problem is, people pointing out security flaws in software are not really lawbreakers, they are investigating and sharing information. Should they really be held criminally liable for the things others do to exploit the vulnerabilities that already exist in the software?

The big question you are probably asking (assuming of course that you have hung in with me this long...yay you!) is why should you care. You should care because a new round of legislation is coming that will push the boundaries of these laws even further. The legislation will increase the penalties for copyright crimes. It will also add more benign activities to the list of copyright crimes. Finally it will create and fund an agency within the FBI that is tasked with monitoring and enforcing these laws. This agency will be empowered with a new range of wiretapping and datatapping abilities.

Ok, Ok...I know, you may still be asking yourself why you should care. Let me give you a "for example": You purchase a shiny new Ipod and you want to listen to some of your favorite Beatle's songs on it when you go for a run in the morning. You pop your Beatle's CD into your computer and rip the songs into Itunes so you can upload it onto your Ipod. So far so good, right? Wrong. The record company installed some protection software on the CD to prevent it from being copied...unfortunately the protection software wasn't good enough to prevent the music from being transferred to your Ipod. You have unwittingly circumvented their security measures and technically you have violated their copyright...punishable up to 10 years in prison. Is anyone really going to come after you for this? No, but we shouldn't be passing laws that allow people to come after you for ridiculous things like this.

Here is another "for example" for you: You work at a place that allows a lot of telecommuting. Due to the large files that you and your workmates need to use, your company has set up a filesharing system to make is faster to share recently updated file changes between team members. As a result, you have an unusually large amount of data uploading and downloading from your home internet connection. You paid good money for your internet connection and all of the files are legal, so there is no problem here...right? Wrong. Your internet provider has an agreement with the FBI to tip them off to unusual internet activity from their customers. As a result they bring you to the FBI's attention who begins intercepting and examining all of the data going to and from your computer. Every confidential work document, every internet search, every email...everything. Is there any real immediate damage here? Probably not as you wouldn't even be aware that it was happening. Are you comfortable with government agencies having the power to spy on you for no reason other than you use the internet a lot? I'm not!

So what can you do?

1. Pay attention and speak up! Right now the loudest voices are the recording and software companies. Congress needs to here that we are aware of these issues and we care about our digital rights.

2. Support organizations that defend your digital rights. The EFF comes to mind.

One last thought to send you on your way...someone downloading child porn will face a sentence of up to 5 years. Someone downloading illegal music will face a sentence of up to 10 years. Something is clearly out of whack here.